Pam: I can't even take off my hat, because then I'm Hitler.
Pam: They came up with that idea really fast.
Michael: I've dated almost four women, and you are so far above them it's stupid.
Holly: Please don't make it harder than it has to be.
Michael: That's what she said.
Creed (on Cornell University): It's pronounced "Colonel." It's the highest rank in the military.
Michael: Here's my wish. I want you to meet a great guy and I want you to be happy. My wish has come true, incidentally.
Darryl: Please call me back. Please.
Andy: When the hourglass strikes three, then in the room whence employees confer.
Andy: Applicant has a head shaped like a trapezoid.
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