Celebrity Apprentice season 2 coming in March

God help me, as bad as Celebrity Apprentice season 1 was, I must have gotten some enjoyment out of it because I'm looking forward to season 2. Yeah, I'm gonna recap it. (I'll just keep telling myself: It's for charity. It's for charity. It's for charity.)

There's an article about it here, including a list of apprentices.

Note that the article has a page 2 - don't miss it, or you won't get a complete mental picture of the melange of horror that awaits. Said melange will be dispensed in two-hour servings on Sunday nights.

Don't worry, NBC! That doesn't smack of desperation at all!

12/11/08: Great Moments in "The Office"

Dwight: They don't give out black belts for things that are stupid.

Phyllis: This isn't your grandmother's Christmas. Unless of course she's from Morocco.

Phyllis: I think for it to be blackmail, it would have to be a formal letter.

Michael: That is vodka, and I mixed it with orange juice. I call it an orange-vod-juice-ka.

Jim: Would you want to do it on Groundhog Day?
Michael: No, no... I celebrate privately.

Kevin: Fire Girl!! Too soon?

Michael: I am not asking her to stop drinking. I am imploring her to quit being an alcoholic.

Michael: Have you ever, under the influence of alcohol, questioned the teachings of the Mormon church?

Dwight: In the Shrute family, we believe in a five-fingered intervention: awareness, education, control, acceptance, and punching.

Michael: What is going to happen when you come in to work and you're dead?

Darryl: Something wrong with the doll?
Toby: No, uh... it's even better than the one I wanted.

Michael: I need to find ways to push Meredith to the bottom. I think I can do it. I did it with Jan.

Andy: Ooh - tough room.

12/4/08: Great Moments in "The Office"

I watched the episode twice because it was so funny... but only one line struck me as quoteworthy.

Michael: I swallowed all your ideas. I'm going to digest them and see what comes out the other end.

11/20/08: Great Moments in "The Office"

Michael: Look at him with his stupid face, stupid tan.

Kevin: You're gonna live in the same house that you used to pee the bed in?

Jim: Why would you want to buy ugly wood from trees when you can have paneling? And a painting of some creepy clowns that is apparently crucial to the structural integrity of the building.

Creed: We should hang out by the quarry and throw things down there.

Meredith: "Sincerely, Disappointed." Get off your high horse, Richy.

Michael: That is like trying to be friends with an evil snail.

Dwight: I love catching people in the act. That's why I always whip open doors.

Pam: Why aren't you as mad or interested in this as me? Are you inching away from me?

Dwight: I've framed animals before. I framed a raccoon for opening a Christmas present, and I framed a bear for eating out of the garbage.

Michael: It just seems awfully mean, but sometimes the ends justify the mean.

Ryan: I'm going to Thailand with some friends from high school. Well, a high school.... Let's have sex one more time, and if you have any extra cash, that would be amazing.

11/13/08: Great Moments in "The Office"

Michael: In Italy, you must always wash your hands after going to the bathroom. This is considered to be polite.

Michael: I have always been intrigued by all things international. The women, the pancakes, the man of mystery...

Dwight: You wanna wear that puppy way up on the breastbone, like a bra.

Meredith: I know my way around a van.

Ryan: This looks like where I'll probably do my push-ups every day.

Michael: A concierge is the Winnipeg equivalent of a geisha. This is a woman who has been trained in the fine art of fanciness and pleasure.

Andy: I wanna take you to sex school.

Michael: I could be making more money as a doctor or a professional athlete.

Ryan: For whatever reason, I just couldn't do better than Kelly.

Updated Mad Men recap and post-season miscellany

I've updated the season-end recap with some minor corrections and additional detail. Sorry for the delay. I have a hard time dealing with "last episodes."

If you watch Boston Legal, look out for actor Mark Moses, aka Mad Men's Duck Phillips, in Monday night's episode.

If you watch The Office, you may or may not have recognized actor Rich Sommer, aka Mad Men's Harry Crane, without his glasses. He was Pam's friend in New York. I knew he looked familiar, but I couldn't figure out where I'd seen him before!

Last but not least, you can read Frank O'Hara's poem "Meditations in an Emergency" for free at this site. Please note that this is only the title poem... the book Meditations in an Emergency contains many more.

11/6/08: Great Moments in "The Office"

(In case you didn't recognize him without the glasses - Pam's friend in New York was played by Rich Sommer, aka Harry Crane in Mad Men.)

Jim: You wouldn't know from looking at her, but Pam's a gold-digger.

Pam: What color mustard is his shirt? Yellow or dijon?

Jim: You can't go wrong buying a house you can't afford.

Dwight: Buttlicker, our prices have never been lower!

Angela: I don't want to be married in a tent like a hobo. Nana Mimi can't be in canvas that long.

Dwight: I know you're the mastermind, but you're too stupid to do it by yourself.

Kelly: Dwight, get out of my nook.
Pam: That's what she said! That's what she said! That's what she said!

Dwight: You juked the stats, cupcake.

Michael: You cannot say "I was raped" and expect all of your problems to go away, Kelly. Not again.

Michael: I cannot tell you how much leftover guacamole I have ended up eating over the years.

Jim: That's it, I want to talk to this guy. Put me in his ear.

Dwight: This wedding is officially out of your hands.

10/30/08: Great Moments in "The Office"

Pam: I can't even take off my hat, because then I'm Hitler.

Pam: They came up with that idea really fast.

Michael: I've dated almost four women, and you are so far above them it's stupid.

Holly: Please don't make it harder than it has to be.
Michael: That's what she said.

Creed (on Cornell University): It's pronounced "Colonel." It's the highest rank in the military.

Michael: Here's my wish. I want you to meet a great guy and I want you to be happy. My wish has come true, incidentally.

Darryl: Please call me back. Please.

Andy: When the hourglass strikes three, then in the room whence employees confer.

Andy: Applicant has a head shaped like a trapezoid.

"The Simpsons" pays tribute to "Mad Men"

That was the season finale, but we're not done just yet! Mark your calendars for The Simpsons on November 2. They'll be doing a Mad Men tribute.

Mad Men #26 (2.13), 10/26/08: Peggy gives her confession

It's approximately October 22, 1962, when Kennedy gave his first televised speech about the Cuban missile crisis.

It turns out that Betty was bleeding last week because she's pregnant. He gives her some standard (for the time) pregnancy advice. He is surprised that Betty isn't showing more enthusiasm. At first, he thinks it's because she's afraid the pregnancy will affect her appearance. She tells him, "I can't have a baby right now." The doctor says the option she's hinting at is "for young girls who have no other options." He assures her that her husband and friends will make her feel better about it.

The doctor leaves the room so that Betty can undress for the exam. Instead, she leaves.

At the office, the mad men (minus Pete) wonder why they're being asked for ad revenue numbers earlier than usual, and if it has anything to do with Don's mysterious absence. Their pet theory is that the company might be considering opening a west coast office to cash in on the aerospace boom.

Pete is worried about what's going to happen to him when it's understood that they're losing the Clearasil account because of his problems with Trudy's father. Peggy advises him to be honest about what happened, without worrying about the outcome, because "people respect that." She also warns him, half-jokingly, not to blame it on Creative.

Don returns from his magical mystery tour and meets Betty at the stables (she has been riding, contrary to the doctor's orders). He seems apologetic and sincere. Betty expresses doubt and says things haven't been much different without him. She promises to call him later.

Pete meets with Duck, who offers him a drink (he's about to pour one for himself anyway). Pete tells him about losing the Clearasil account. He specifically says that it's not the fault of Sales or Creative; Duck easily guesses that it's Pete's father-in law.

Duck confidentially tells Pete that they'll soon be merging with the British company, and Duck will be president of Sterling-Cooper. He wants Pete to replace him as head of Accounts. Pete asks about Don, but Duck is cocky and says Don will either have to knuckle under or find a new job, since they all have non-competes in their contracts. (Evidently he doesn't know that Don insisted on working without a contract, as a condition of not jumping ship with a competitor last season. Which calls into question how Don would have been able to jump ship with a non-compete in his contract in the first place... I don't remember the details.)

Next day: it's raining. Don returns to the office. Joan updates him on recent developments and asks about the company's Civil Defense procedure. Don expresses skepticism that hiding under their desks will save their lives.

Pete is upset that Don abandoned him to handle General Dynamics alone; he reminds Don that he can't even drive. Nevertheless, Don thinks Pete did fine and congratulates Pete on handling things so well without him. Don says that Pete sometimes wants things before he's ready for them; now, in his opinion, Pete's ready.

Roger tells Don about the impending merger. Don's share will net him more than half a million dollars. Don is speechless. Roger spins the story such that Bert Cooper and his sister loved the idea, and Roger just went along to be team player. (I don't think even he believes that he's fooling Don.)

Roger is also miffed with President Kennedy for daring the Russians to bomb them from Cuba, just as he's about to get married. Don says they can't know what's really going on.

Peggy goes to Mass, where Fr. Gill urges his flock to confess their sins to God just in case they all get killed.

Betty is at the beauty shop, where neighbor Francine and some other women chat worriedly about the missiles pointed at them from Cuba, waiting to wipe them all out. Betty is sitting off to the side; she can hear them, but that doesn't prevent them from talking about her too. One woman thinks Betty's smug because she has a bomb shelter (not that I know of!). Another woman complains that they shouldn't discuss this in front of her daughter. Francine thinks it's better to be open with the kids about it.

Assuming that Betty is worrying about the missiles too, Francine offers her a Miltown. Betty tells her she's pregnant and that it's not a good time to be pregnant. Francine tells her about a doctor in Albany and a hospital procedure in Puerto Rico (not a good time to go to PR either). She advises Betty not to be hasty.

The madmen are getting more nervous not that there's a memo out asking for a list of people in every department. (Also, Harry's TV isn't working.) They pull Lois out of the switchboard room (apparently she got to stay with Sterling-Cooper after Don banished her from the secretarial pool). Lois swears them to secrecy and says that she and the other switchboard ladies have figured out that they're merging with the British advertising agency, and that there will be redundancies. Lois begs them to rescue her from the switchboard if they survive the redundancies.

Betty drops the kids off at the Roosevelt to spend the night with Don, where they order room service and watch Leave it to Beaver. (It's the one where a girl has to break a date with Wally because she has to stay home with her sister, so Wally suggests that they double-date with her sister and Beaver.) Don writes a letter.

Betty sees something she likes in a store window and buys it. Then she goes into a swanky lounge for water and a gimlet. A handsome stranger pays for the drink and tries to make conversation about the scary missiles. She rebuffs him, but then meets him in the service hallway (or whatever it is) and makes out with him. She tells him she's married. I think I see a ring on his hand too. He doesn't have a problem with that, so they have hasty sofa sex in either an office or a club room. Afterwards, she declines to tell the stranger her name. Then she goes home and feasts on leftover fried chicken.

Peggy brings some baked goods to Father Gill for the church's basement/fallout shelter - her mother thought the place should be well-stocked in case a lot of people have to stay there for a while. He warns Peggy that their lives could be ended in a rain of Cuban missiles at any moment and then she'd die and go to hell. He feels that God his sent him to this parish specifically to save her; he begs her to confess her sin. Evidently, however, Peggy's not sure that God's the one she needs to settle things with.

Trudy gathers her and Pete's valuables and prepares to take them with her to her parents' place in Rehoboth Beach. (She's worried about looters.) Pete says that a nuclear blast would put her parents' lawn furniture in their Manhattan living room anyway. Trudy gives him an envelope full of cash and urges him to pay someone to drive him to Rehoboth Beach if he needs to get out of Manhattan in a hurry. Pete says he wants to die in Manhattan.

Next day, the mad men are still worrying about the merger. Harry says he thinks it best to remain neutral; a loyalist will probably be fired. Paul whines and feels that Harry's attitude is crass.

Pete tells Don off-the-record that he knows about the merger, and that Duck is expecting to take over and hold it over Don's head. He can't explain why he's warning Don, but thought Don would like to know.

(There's a lot of undercurrent in this episode about "taking a stand" vs. "daring" the Russians. I just thought I'd mention it, because "undercurrent" is difficult to capture in a recap.)

Betty comes home from another day with the horsies and finds a note that Don left for her when he dropped off the kids with Carla. In the letter, he says that she won't be alone long, but he'll be alone forever if he can't be with her. (From what I've seen, he's alone even when they're together.)

Now there's the meeting with the British advertising guys, plus Bert Cooper, Roger, Don, and Duck. The British guys announce that Duck will be president. Duck pretends to be surprised, and happily accepts. He demurely says he's not prepared yet, then stands and gives a prepared speech about where he'd like to take the company.

He wants to increase the role of television advertising, and de-emphasize Creative. (Don beams in expectation.) Bert is annoyed that client satisfaction isn't even mentioned. Don takes this opportunity to quit. The British guys are taken aback. Duck gloats about the "artistic temperament" and Don's ego. He smugly mentions Don's contract. Don tells him, "I don't have a contract." Roger casually says they didn't feel he needed a contract.

Don says he's willing to discuss this further on Monday, and leaves. Duck says they can replace Don in a second with some kid. The British guy asks Duck to leave the room for a moment. Roger nervously asks if this will affect the merger. The British guy says that Duck never could hold his liquor.

(I assume that they've set him up to fail. Duck made his role in this merger conditional upon being put in charge; now that the merger's a reality, they don't need him any more, and they know he's a boozer. The British guy has been encouraging Duck to drink ever since that restaurant meeting a few weeks ago; they even sent a case of gin to his office. I suppose the plan was to hasten his departure.)

Joan tells Don that Betty has asked him to come home. Don sends Joan home too; the radio is on, and everyone in the office seems to be a nervous wreck.

Pete invites Peggy into his office for a drink. He says he picked the wrong woman. He understands her, and she understands him. He thinks she's perfect.

She tells him that she's not perfect. He says he loves her. She could have shamed him into being with her forever, but she didn't want to: she had his baby and she gave it away.

"I'm sorry, Pete." Pete is stunned.

Don comes home to his family, and they have a regular evening.

Pete spends the night awake with that silly rifle (the one he traded a surplus chip'n'dip wedding gift for) in his lap.

Peggy prays in her pink bed.

Betty is washing the dishes. The radio says that the Russians are taking their missiles down. Betty tells Don that she's pregnant. He takes her hand.

Quote of the week: "One day you're there, and all of a sudden there's less of you. And you wonder where that part went, if it's living somewhere outside of you, and you keep thinking maybe you'll get it back. And then you realize, it's just gone." (Peggy)

10/23/08: Great Moments in "The Office"

Michael: I'm actually thinking of getting my own set of putt-putt golf clubs.

Michael: If she starts having sex with me, I'll know for sure.

Phyllis: You're making a knife with a knife?

Dwight: She introduced me to so many things: pasteurized milk, sheets, monotheism, presents on your birthday, preventative medicine...

Phyllis: Angela's not really a risk taker, and Andy's not a risk.

Michael: If we turn these dials all the way down, now THEY CAN'T HEAR US.

Kevin: Oscar, I'm now going to be prone to surges.

Dwight: Motive - financial, or possibly vintage HP computer collectors.

Michael: So much for sex without consequences.

Andy: You're always safe with me. I'm a very good screamer.

Creed: Nobody steals from Creed Bratton and gets away with it. The last person to do this disappeared. His name? Creed Bratton.

Michael: It squeaks when you bang it. That's what she said.

Dwight: You slap like a girl.

Dwight: I'll tell you what Phyllis did wrong. She stuck her nose in my business and tried to help me.

Hints of the Mad Men season 2 finale, "Meditations in an Emergency"

They don't tell you much, but there are two photos: This one and this one.

Also, this preview video!

Mad Men #25 (2.12), 10/19/08: The Original Mrs. Draper

Betty signs Don's name on his latest paycheck. (She's a lefty.) She catches Sally smoking a cigarette in the bathroom and has a fit. She sticks the kid in the closet and promises a variety of other punishments. Sally threatens to tell Daddy and says he left because Mommy's stupid and mean and she won't let him come home. Sally also notes that his suitcase is there in the closet, suggesting that she doesn't believe Betty's story that he's on a business trip.

Betty opens the closet. Sally wants to call Daddy. Betty lets her out, and Sally begs Betty not to tell him.

Peggy is hosting a meeting in her office - the noisy copy room. They are trying to figure out how to sell Popsicles in the winter. She and Sal compare notes on childhood treats; their mothers always broke the pops in half. This act of sharing strikes Peggy as very Christian, almost like the sacrament of Communion. I sense a brainstorm coming.

Hildy tells Pete that Accounting is dinging him again over his expenses. Also, he has an appointment with adoption people. She congratulates him, but he is taken by surprise and does not look happy.

Bertram Cooper meets with his sister, Alice. (Yes, her name is Alice Cooper.) She's the company's other major stockholder in addition to Bert and Roger. She refuses to remove her shoes in his office, on the grounds that her stockings are better than his carpet. She is in favor of the sale to to Duck's British friends. He's unsure; he (apparently) promised Roger's father to take care of him, and he's not eager to retire, and he doesn't trust the British.

Don arrives in San Pedro, CA by bus and goes to a house. He falls into a flashback.

Anna - the woman who confronted New Don Draper at the car dealership a few weeks ago - was Original Don Draper's wife. At first, he tries to lie, but she's too smart and she threatens to expose him. He apologizes and tells her what happened (though he omits the fact that he switched their tags). She is sad to hear that Original Don never mentioned her; she admits he had actually wanted to marry her sister, who had two good legs. (Anna walks with a slight limp.) He offers her Original Don's medals and such, and some money.

In the present, Anna answers the door. She is thrilled to see Don. A piano student is practicing "The Hall of the Mountain King" (the real title of this episode). Don applauds. Anna introduces Don as her friend Dick. The boy leaves, and Don and Anna chat briefly. It's obvious that they're good friends, and she can tell something's up; but right now, Don wants only a shower and a nap.

Back in Manhattan, Pete goes home and hollers at Trudy for trying to arrange an adoption. He grabs her lovely roasted chicken and throws it over the balcony. He pours himself a drink and turns on the TV, where the movie of the night is The Day the Earth Stood Still (remake to be released in December, with an incredible cast including our own Don Draper).

Joanie and her fiance, Dr. Greg Harris, are having sex. Sort of. It sounds as though he's been "tired" for a while, and he admits he's tired tonight too. She gets on top of him and offers to take over. He is turned off and embarrassed by her initiative and her experience, and he expresses misgivings about her past, which she won't discuss. He feigns sleepiness and rolls away from her.

Peggy is still at the office. She sneaks a cigarette out of a secretary's desk on her way out.

It's still sunny in California, three time zones away. Don is wearing Anna's ex-boyfriend's old pants. They're too big. He admires the porch. She grins and says he paid for it. She invites him to tell her about what's happening to him; she feels that they met to make each others' lives better.

He talks about his home life and says he ruined everything. He tells her about sending Adam away (he doesn't tell her that Adam hanged himself afterwards), and says that Anna knows more about him than Betty does. Anna says that's because he loves Betty. "I'm sure there are things about her you don't know." He doesn't want to phone home. He admits to feeling alienated from his own life.

Roger is excited about the merger offer; his enthusiasm seems to annoy Cooper even more. Especially since it's motivated by Roger's divorce from the woman that Cooper's own deceased wife introduced him to. Roger becomes sarcastic and reminds Cooper that it's a merger, not a sellout.

Pete dictates a letter to some aerospace company to convince them to spend some money on advertising to get public support (and government funding) for their efforts. Tom, his father-in-law, calls. He threatens to have Clearasil dump Sterling-Cooper because Pete isn't making Trudy happy. Pete says he DID love Trudy, but Tom and his wife are the ones who made her unhappy, getting her obsessed with having children. Then he tries to backpedal on the "WAS in love with her" comment, but it doesn't work.

It's Christmas Eve sometime in the 50s. "I met a girl," New Don tells Anna excitedly. He loves the way she laughs and he wants to marry her. He is totally smitten. He wants to introduce them, and Anna is excited. He reminds her they'll need a divorce. He promises her a good alimony payment. She tries to let him out of it, but he feels obligated to Original Don. She's tickled by the whole thing but also feels that it means this will be their last Christmas together. He disagrees and thinks she should be his "cousin" from now on. She wants him to start a new life instead.

Ken tells the Popsicle folks that Don is out sick, but he's signed off on everything. Peggy does the pitch. She tells them about kids splitting Popsicles. It's not about summer; it's a ritual about sharing that's as meaningful coming out of the freezer as it is from the ice cream truck. "Take it, break it, share it, love it." The client rep, who looks grumpy even when he's pleased, admits that they were secretly wanting something with the word "love" in it.

Also, I notice that Peggy is wearing grownup clothes these days.

Betty calls her friend Sarah Beth, supposedly to ask about the private school SB's daughter goes to. Then she mentions that Arthur and Tara are getting married next weekend. After a long silence, she smirks and asks SB if she's still there. SB admits she's a mess over Arthur. Betty smirks some more, "really?" SB says she can't even sleep. She can't stop thinking about him. She thinks her husband suspects. She's made a terrible mistake.

SB is defensive with Betty; she says that Betty wanted him too. Betty self-righteously taunts her that there's a difference between wanting and having. SB blames Betty for encouraging her, and says Betty's an awful woman. "No one MADE you sleep with him," Betty says triumphantly. SB hangs up on her.

You need to see this for yourself to appreciate how smug Betty is about her infidelity-by-proxy.



The Xerox repairman snottily instructs Peggy on the proper operation of the copy machine and tells her to repeat it to all of her little friends. (I wish this was a telenovela; then he'd get run over by a car or something for disrespecting her.)

She intercepts Roger on his way out of his office and tells him that she single-handedly got the Popsicle account. She thinks she should have Freddie's office. He agrees. He says, "you young women are very aggressive... it's cute." He's impressed that she asked him when none of the guys did.

Joan comes in with Dr. Greg and tells Roger about their dinner plans. "I thought you hated French food," Roger comments. Their familiarity is not lost on Greg.

It's the end of the day, and almost everyone has left the office. Greg asks Joan to mix him a drink in Don's office. She's not so sure, but he wants her to pretend he's her boss. She can see he's in a playful mood and pours his drink. He puts the moves on her, but she doesn't want to do it in Don's office. He doesn't back down and asks how Roger knows so much about her. She reminds him that she's worked there for nine years.

He becomes aggressive; again she says it's not her office to fool around in. He pushes her down onto the floor. "This is what you want, right?" he hisses in her ear. She says no multiple times and tries to push him away, but he likes it better this way. He rapes her, and she zones out and stares at Don's coffee table. Then they act like nothing happened and go to dinner. (I hope he is smashed to death by a defenestrated copy machine repairman.)

Roger, Alice, and Bert meet with the Sterling-Cooper lawyer, Mr. Whitehouse. Bert says that Don's 12% ownership makes him "mathematically insignificant." Still, Bert and Alice are curious about his absence. Roger tells them, off the record, that Don's taking care of some marital problems. Alice and Roger vote yea on the merger. Bert also votes yea, but in a defeated tone. (This only means that Whitehouse will issue a counteroffer; it's not a done deal yet.) Roger says they're all rich. Alice says he has to think of his children, too. "I just have the one," Roger says, confused. "Really?" Alice says sarcastically.

I like Alice. I hope she comes back soon. As for Bert, he looks like he just donated all of his internal organs by mistake.

Don is bringing groceries to Anna's place when he runs into some guys (Kess and son Doogie, and their friend Walt) working on hotrods. Don recognizes the ancient car parts from when he used to sell them... used. He introduces himself as Dick. He's intrigued and says he needs work, and offers to help, but they say business isn't great. Don wants to see them race. They invite them to an event in Long Beach.

Peggy moves her stuff into Freddie's old office. Peggy asks about Don. Joan has no info, but congratulates Peggy on her move. Peggy says nice things about Dr. Greg. Joan hesitates, then smiles and gives what sounds like a well-rehearsed speech about his virtues. He specializes in thoracic surgery and volunteers at the hospital in Harlem, "stitching up Negro children."

Paul is back from Mississippi, alive and in one piece. Harry says Sheila dumped Paul three days into the trip. (What took her so long?) The guys, especially Harry, are pissed that Peggy has her own office. Speaking of pissed, Ken advises her to get a new couch. With a straight face, Joan tells them that Don called and told them to get back to work. Joan promises Peggy she'll get the name changed on her door. She also says she's getting married at Christmas.

(Hopefully they will honeymoon in Mexico, so she can get divorced in time for New Year's.)

Betty apologizes to Sally for being unfair and offers her a gift - a pair of riding boots. (It appears that Bobby, the icky little son that Betty seems to despise, will be getting jack squat.) Betty admits to Sally that she and Daddy aren't getting along, and she doesn't even know where he is or when he's coming back. But "everything's going to be okay." This seems to satisfy Sally.

Then Betty gets a funny look and gets up from the couch and looks down. "Mommy, you're bleeding," Sally says, looking somewhere in the vicinity of her pants. (We don't get to see what she's referring to, but it seems to take Betty by surprise. Let's just hope she doesn't end up needing thoracic surgery.)

Don repairs a chair for Anna while she lays out some tarot cards. He scoffs at the cards, saying you just see what you want to see. He notices she received the copy of "Meditations in an Emergency" he sent her. She said it worried her. He's a little worried about some of the cards he sees. Her verdict, based on the position of the Soul of the World card, is that "the only thing keeping you from being happy is the belief that you are all alone." She says he can change. He doesn't think people can change. She says you learn things as you live. Don stares at the window. He can smell the ocean.

Pete visits Peggy in her office, where she's drinking from the remains of Freddie's bar. He asks her how she got the room. She jokes that she's sleeping with Don. He tells her that Clearasil's pulling out. He declines to go into the details, but he anticipates that Don will dance on his grave.

Peggy asks what happened in LA. Pete says Don disappeared, didn't even check out at the hotel. Pete hints that he knows things about Don and says he might not come back. "He's done it before." Peggy adamantly doesn't want to hear about Don's secrets and she's sure whatever Don does is for a good reason. Pete congratulates her again and leaves.

Don wades into the ocean with his pants on.

Closing music: "Cup of Loneliness" by George Jones
Quote of the week: "I have been watching my life. It's right there. I keep scratching at it, trying to get into it. I can't." (Don)
Next week: The Season 2 finale. Way too soon!

Jon Hamm hosting Saturday Night Live 10/25

D'oh! I forgot to watch Jeopardy on Friday, so I totally missed the Man Men-inspired category.

But I'm not going to forget to watch Jon Hamm host SNL on 10/25.

10/16/08: Great Moments in "The Office"

Dwight: Growing up, I performed my own circumcision.

Michael: Did you get the live storks?

Meredith: "Ass-turd"?

Michael: Where's my golden shower, Phyllis?

Phyllis: I'm no longer under Angela's heel, and her little grape-head is under mine.

Stanley: You think my nipples don't get sore too?

Dwight: Jan had the baby and Michael wasn't there to mark it. So the baby could be anybody's. Except Michael's.

Michael: Babies are drawn to me, and I think it's because they see me as one of them. But cooler.

Kevin: Who wants to guess when the baby will be born?

Jan: You don't flash around a newborn baby.

Michael: I was going to talk to Holly about her hygiene. She smells like old tomatoes and dirt.

Dwight: I like to call this the bumper test.

Michael: I didn't feel much when I held Astrid, but I got a good feeling from Holly.

Mad Men on Jeopardy & next episode preview

Straight from AMC's PR people:

On Friday, October 17, Jeopardy! will feature a category inspired by Mad Men and the early 1960s.

Starting today, October 13, Jeopardy! has an online version of its Mad Men game.

Details at AMC's Mad Men blog.

Also, there are only two more episodes left in this season. Next episode preview here. Pete receives unwelcome news. Wotta grouch!

Mad Men #24 (2.11), 10/12/08: Don's magical mystery tour

Roger asks Jane to marry him, which necessitates a divorce from Mona. Roger's lawyer warns it will be expensive.

At a brainstorming meeting for Right Guard, Ken points out that women have body odor too. Peggy flippantly proposes that there should be a Right Guard deodorant product for women. Since no Gillette reps are there at the time, this idea doesn't go anywhere (at least not for now!).

According to a presentation at the rocket show, the USSR has the technology to totally bomb the USA at a moment's notice, as well as a very sophisticated defense system. It's wildly exaggerated, but it seems to get to Don.

Duck approaches Roger about becoming a partner. Roger turns him down flat, saying his numbers haven't been what Duck had promised.

Don is befriended by a freewheeling bunch of attractive, cosmopolitan, well-traveled, unemployed, possibly rich people (or maybe just very accomplished moochers), including a young woman named Joy. He makes a spur-of-the-moment decision to ditch the rocket show without telling Pete so that he can hang out with his new pals in Palm Springs. (This after being grumpy with Pete for wanting to hang out and socialize.)

Pete doesn't like CA and doesn't find the people friendly, but does his best to conduct business... from the hotel pool... without Don.

Don goes to the house in Palm Springs. It supposedly belongs to some friends of theirs who are out of town. Don passes out from heat stroke, but he's okay. Joy is very vague about who these people are or why they wander around. I keep thinking it's a cult or something, but Don doesn't seem worried.

At dinner, a man who is later to revealed to be Joy's father says he's smarter and stronger now than he ever was, which is another reason I kept thinking they were some kind of cult and they were going to try to sell Don a "secret," but this doesn't go anywhere.

At the office, when Ken, Sal, Joan, and Harry hear that Peggy and Kurt have a date to see Bob Dylan, they start to tease, but Kurt casually tells them that he's gay.



Peggy pretends not to be shocked. After he leaves the room, the rest of the guys complain, horrified, and ask Smitty if he knew about this. (LOL!) Smitty explains, "he's from Europe. It's different there." And that means more ladies for him, he says, gazing hopefully at Joan. They're so rattled they want to call a meeting to warn the female employees.

Duck meets with his former employer, who is miffed that he's not drinking (evidently they don't know about his problem; they didn't fire him - he quit) and don't want to hire him back. He drinks two Gibsons and tries to get them to buy out Roger's share of Sterling-Cooper - it'll be cheap because of Roger's ugly divorce. He wants to be in charge of accounts and specifically asks that Creative report to him.

Kurt shows up at Peggy's and she gives him a chance to dump her in favor of a boy if he wants. She complains that she doesn't pick the right boys. He says it's her outdated hairstyle, so he gives her a haircut before the Dylan show. He finally cuts off that damn stupid ponytail that's been bugging me all this time and she looks fabulous!!

Joy tells Don that the next stop is Nassau, and then Capri. She thinks it has "something to do with taxes." He's welcome to stay with them - her dad likes him and Joy says he can fool around with anyone he likes; she's not possessive.

Duck receives a case of gin from his British pal, his former employer. Apparently this is the go-ahead signal to proceed with the deal. He gives one bottle to Joan.

The madmen see on TV that there's a lot of racially-charged unrest in Mississippi, where Paul and Sheila have gone to do good deeds for civil rights. A black man has just enrolled at the state university, and the protest riots have been so severe that President Kennedy sent in Federal forces to restore order. (Let's forget that it was early August last week when Marilyn Monroe died and Pete and Don left for California, and that this event took place in late September.)

Pete returns to the office with a bag of oranges. He's surprised to hear that no one has heard from Don. He likes Peggy's haircut. Ken tells him about Kurt. Evidently, this news is ruining his week.

Duck pops a breath mint and tells Cooper and Sterling that Putnam, Powell, & Lowe approached him and want to buy them out. This will be the company's chance to make the big time. He makes it sound as though he's going to play hardball with them. Cooper wants them to make the first move.

Don lounges alone in the Palm Springs house and places a phone call. He says he's Dick Whitman and he wants to see this unnamed person. He hastily writes something - I think an address, but it's too blurry to see - on the last page of the book Joy's been reading, The Sound and the Fury. He tears the page out (Joy's in for a rude surprise).

Don's luggage, which got lost on the way to California (he's been borrowing things at the house), is delivered to the Draper home. No one comes to the door.

Closing music: "What'll I Do" by Johnny Mathis.
Quote of the week: "I like sex. You do, too - I can tell." (Joy)
Next week: Don's still MIA.

10/9/08: Great Moments in "The Office"

Creed: The tall guy got engaged.
Michael: To be married?

Michael: Why are you helping her? You're not even dating her.

Andy: I took "Intro to Philosophy" twice. No big deal.

Dwight: It's a trick question. The bread is poisoned. Also, it's not your real family. You've been cuckolded by a stronger, smarter male.

Michael: You are a thief of joy.

Meredith: I wouldn't have done it if it wasn't for the discount paper. Not a lot of fruit in those looms.

Jim: The story's kind of bland. It's about this guy named Dumbledore Calrissian who needs to return the ring back to Mordor.

Michael: I just don't want my employees thinking that their jobs depend on performance.

Michael: Meredith needs this job. This is her main source of money.

Michael: I saw this thing like a belt with a key... it's more of an undewear garment.

Michael: How do you tell somebody that you care about deeply, "I told you so"?

Stan: It's a quarter to five, and I have started to gather my things.

Next time on Mad Men

Here's a longer preview of the next episode. Looks like Peggy just casually created a new product.

Mad Men #23 (2.10), 10/5/08: It's not easy for anyone

Paul and Pete will be going to a trade show for engineering companies wanting to join the space race. Peggy has prepared a detailed and helpful report, and Don gets annoyed when it's apparent that they didn't read it. When Paul starts saying something pompous, Don interrupts and specifically says that Pete should do all the talking. Paul should do the listening.

Pete won't let Trudy to go with him, supposedly because he thinks it will make him seem less serious to his coworkers. She'll spend the time with her parents instead, then; they're worried that they haven't had a kid yet. The topic annoys Pete. Trudy tries to talk to him about adoption. He doesn't like the idea, but he's worried her parents think he says no to everything.

Betty calls Don at his hotel. Her father had a stroke three days ago and she only just found out now from her brother because father's wife Gloria didn't bother to tell her. Don wants her to leave the kids with a neighbor now and he'll come over, but she doesn't want to wake the kids. She grumpily agrees to let him come over in the morning.

He and Betty go there the next day. Gloria, who quickly establishes herself as the queen of vapid small talk, insists it was no big deal. Betty's brother William arrives. He expresses envy at the sight of Don's Cadillac. Betty's father seems glad to see them. Betty expresses a wish that Gloria had called sooner, supposedly so they could hook him up with a really good doctor. William makes a snide remark about how she and Don think everything's better in New York.

Dad calls Betty "Ruthie" (his deceased wife). Gloria kindly explains that she's Betty, his daughter, and reminds him that Ruth is dead. He shakes Betty's hand like a stranger. Then he's himself again. He says this stroke was just like last time. Betty is even more upset that no one told her about any previous stroke. It seems that there have been a few.

Sheila meets Paul at the office for lunch. Pete mentions the trip to LA. It's news to her. She's miffed because Paul hadn't mentioned it yet. As far as she knows, they were going to be registering black voters in Mississippi. She's mad that he's put work stuff first. He tells her that she can always get another grocery store job, but his job is harder to replace.

In the elevator, Paul insists that Hollis call him Paul (not "Mr. Kensington") and introduces Sheila. Sheila says she'll go to Mississippi without him. He wants her to wait till after his trip.

Pete meets with his brother Bud, trying to figure out how to get some of their father's money back for their mother, enough for however long she's going to live. Pete jokes about bumping her off, a la the Hitchcock movie Rope. Bud says his wife Judy doesn't seem to want kids, but they do have a five-year plan. Pete admits they've "tried." Bud assures him that adoption is acceptable.

Don makes a jigsaw puzzle with Betty's dad and William's wife Judy (not to be confused with Bud's wife Judy). He claims that he takes Bobby to baseball games "all the time." (Not that we've noticed?) In the next room, Betty stares at a painting of her mother. She's upset that Gloria has gotten rid of her mother's things. She can't stand her. She and William reminisce over Dad fining them for small talk (Gloria's specialty). William reveals that their father's been acting oddly for a while; at least Gloria takes care of him. He's sour that Betty isn't around to take care of him. Betty is sour that he's taken some of Mother's things. He's mad that she's drunk.

Dad starts grumping about Don. He doesn't know anything about Don's past and he accuses him of taking Betty for granted. "He has no people - you can't trust a person like that," he tells Betty. Then he wants to eat. Betty doesn't. Don tries to cheer her up. She's not in the mood.

Bud and Pete sign financial papers with Mother. Mother greets Pete coldly and has already heard about the possibility of Pete and Trudy adopting. She threatens not to let him inherit anything if he doesn't "keep at it." She says Pete's father saw adoption as "pulling from the discards." Pete blurts that Dad spent all of his money with strangers and there's nothing left. Bud tries to send Pete home and smooth things over; Mother asks Bud about her "fiduciary state." He tries to explain it off as bad investments, but she's better-informed than he expects and doesn't believe him. Pete gratefully leaves.

Don and Betty get ready for bed together, awkwardly, in the guest room. He sleeps on the floor - until she joins him there and gets him to perform his husbandly duty.

He wakes alone in the morning. Betty's in the dining room, where her father and Gloria are criticizing her for smoking too much. Judy comes in with the big ugly vase that Betty had been asking about and apologizes and gives it to Betty. Dad mistakes Betty for Ruth again, makes a pass at her in front of everyone, and gropes at her breast. Gloria blandly explains that he's mixed up. "You're mixed up," he retorts wittily.



Gloria blames it on a lack of sleep. William wants him to go to the doctor again. Gloria's already made the appointment. Dad offers to take Betty into town and buy her a milkshake. (It's not clear that he know who she is.) Don rubs her back protectively. Gloria tries to be upbeat.

Viola - evidently Betty's maid/nanny since childhood - comes in and asks how Betty's kids are. Betty wants her to watch over her father, but it seems she's been marginalized by Gloria. Betty is relieved when the maid agrees that he's very sick - no one else has said it aloud. She says she overheard the doctor say it will only get worse. Betty feels like an orphan. The maid says Betty's job is to take care of her husband and children now. As soon as Betty leaves, Viola says, she'll remember her father the way he used to be.

Don takes Betty home. He offers to get the kids; she says Carla will bring them home later tomorrow. He wants to take a shower; she wants him to leave now. He wants to be there for her, but she sarcastically says she knows how he feels about grieving (he doesn't approve). As for last night, nothing has changed; they were "just pretending."

Don goes to the office and finds Harry's baby shower in progress - more like a cross between a baby shower and a bachelor party, actually - everybody's drinking, and many of the "gifts" are samples from their clients.

Cooper pokes his head in and perfunctorily wishes no one in particular a happy birthday. There's a box from Tiffany's, from Jane ("and Roger, I'm sure," Paul laughs).

Don takes Joan aside to catch up on business. Roger interrupts. Don is very chilly with him and announces that he's going to the rocket fair in Paul's place.

Harry's telling the party he hopes to go to CA soon too, to do TV stuff. Hildy, the secretary he boinked on the night of the 1960 presidential election, drunkenly wishes him luck with the baby. Joan happily tells Paul that his trip is getting canceled. The other partygoers snicker.

Paul calls Sheila and grandly informs her that he'll be going to Mississippi with her after all. He'll be at her side and "make a stand."

After the party, Pete nabs Peggy on her way out and tipsily tells her that he's going away - on a plane. He's nervous because it's how his father died. She sensibly tells him that it's unlikely to happen to two people in one family. He blurts that he hates his mother. Peggy doesn't know what he's talking about, but she tries to reassure him about the flight and tells him to go home. "Everything's so easy for you," he says bitterly. Peggy says it's not easy for anyone.

Betty is drinking alone in the kitchen at night. There's a noise outside. Polly whines. Betty locks the door and goes back to her wine.

Polly is still barking the next morning. Betty looks in the playhouse and finds Glen Bishop (neighbor Helen's son) camped out there. He's been there for a few days; he wanted to see Betty and she wasn't home. His father wants him and his sister Charlotte to live with him, and his mother doesn't care because she's more interested in her boyfriends.

They talk about Glen's mother being angry with Betty. He says he's a "problem" for his parents. His father has a new baby and his wife is mean. Glen takes care of his own sister while his mother writes pamphlets and hands them out.

They watch cartoons for a while. Glen confides that he doesn't like ham, or any meat. He keeps looking at her and smiling. He takes her hand. Finally he says he came to rescue her.

Sally and Bobby come home with Carla. Betty sends the kids upstairs to play. Glen reluctantly goes up with them. (Sally seems interested in him.) Betty calls Helen, who comes over to get him right away. Glen tells Betty he hates her. "I know," Betty says. "I'm sorry." Sally watches sympathetically.

Meanwhile, Paul (with pipe in hand) is boring a busload civil rights volunteers, mostly black, with a pompous speech about how advertising is a force of social change and consumers have no color. Sheila smiles proudly at him. One man seems to listen politely. No one else pays much attention.

Helen comes back to Betty's place to scold Betty. Betty says there's nothing going on, but Glen feels alone and she doesn't blame him. She scolds Helen for not taking good care of him when he depends on her for everything. He doesn't get anything from her. Helen ruefully agrees that she's not a good mother.

Betty admits Don isn't living there any more. The kids don't even know yet. Helen asks if it's over. (She seems like she might be interested.) Betty feels like she'll float away without Don there to hold her down. Helen says it's hard when you realize that you're in charge.

Meanwhile, Don and Pete are floating away to Los Angeles on puffy clouds of cigarette smoke.

Closing music: "Telstar" by the Tornados. It was the first single by a British band to reach #1 in the United States.
Quote of the week: "We can go anywhere. I have money." (Glen Bishop)
Next week: Don calls Pete on his slacking. Roger, who supposedly hates marriage, wants to marry Jane. Duck might be in trouble. Kurt and Smitty are going somewhere.

Next time on Mad Men - Space?

Here's a longer preview of the next episode. Once again, Don singles out Peggy as his star employee of the month.

Mad Men #22 (2.9), 9/28/08: Goodbye, Freddie Jeane

August, 1962.

Don finishes his morning cigarette with a cough. He's rented a nice room at the Roosevelt; the New York World-Telegram outside his door proclaims Marilyn Monroe's death: "MM: ACCIDENT OR SUICIDE? Body of Star Lies Unclaimed."

Carla takes the kids out to school while Betty watches dully from the top of the stairs. After they leave, Betty mocks Carla's cheery greeting in an irritated tone and goes back to her room.

Don and Peggy commiserate with Hollis, the elevator operator, about Monroe. Peggy is surprised that such a famous woman could have been alone. "Some people just hide in plain sight," says Hollis.

"My mother and sister keep calling," Peggy says.
"Suicide is disturbing," Don says. (If he's thinking about his brother, it doesn't show.)
"I keep thinking about Joe DiMaggio," Hollis says as the elevator dings on their floor.

Peggy's glad they never placed that Playtex ad with the Marilyn/Jackie look-alike.

The secretaries are all weeping in the office.

The madmen are planning a blood drive that they want to "win." Don suggests that they pay all of the underlings a dollar apiece for participating. He jokes that the "prize" is helping another human being and watching women faint. Harry says that if they get 100% participation, they'll be in the Times.

Harry asks Don if he'd like to go to NBC's Mitch Miller concert. Don coughs and says his kid is sick. Harry thinks he's been snubbed.

Betty is in her housecoat. She's defrosting the freezer and cutting contact paper to line the kitchen drawers.

Jane tells Don that his daughter called last night and asked when he would come back from his business trip. She blurted "Wednesday." He says "Mrs. Draper is working out some things." He reminds Jane that this is personal and stop giving him concerned looks. She assures him that she's very discreet.

Nitpick: August 5 was the date of Monroe's death; it was a Sunday. That would make this Monday. After this little exchange, it seems that it's Tuesday, but Jane is wearing the same dress that she was crying in earlier. So either they're still crying for a second day, which is somewhat plausible considering that no one claimed Monroe's body, or else this was a slight error. I doubt that Sally called Jane at the office on a Sunday night.

Betty mopes around the house, drinking wine, and turns on the radio. They are talking about - who else - Marilyn Monroe. Betty puts on classical music instead and sits down with a book.

Pete, Peggy, and Sal go to Freddie's office to plan their pitch to Samsonite. He tells them that his daughter is having man problems; I suppose this is his excuse for drinking in the middle of the day.

They talk about the presentation for a while; then Freddie turns around as if to get another drink. He stands there quietly with his back to them, not moving, and then there's a splattering sound around his feet.

Relive the horror here.

He turns back to face them, oblivious. Peggy suggests that he change his pants. The other guys laugh, but Freddie sits down and says he needs to think for a minute. He slumps in his chair - they wonder if he's dead. He's passed out.

And the clients are there. Pete considers putting it off till tomorrow. Sal tells Peggy to do Freddie's part instead. Peggy wants to tell Don. Pete says he'll "handle this." Peggy says that if the clients ask about Freddie, they'll say he's sick.

Pete expresses disgust. Peggy is much more sympathetic. Peggy asks Freddie's receptionist to keep people out of his office.

Betty has been sleeping and/or crying on the couch. (Cough cough, what, does everyone have lung cancer?) Sara Beth (her friend from the stables) is at the door to borrow a dress. Betty says she forgot, and explains that she's sick. She and Don won't be able to go to SB's tonight as planned, but they still have a lunch date on Thursday.

SB thinks her husband is too good for her. She's been seeing a psychiatrist (same one Betty went to, I think); diagnosis: boredom. SB saw Arthur, their young friend, fight with his girlfriend, and she's been dreaming about him ever since. She'd like Betty to ride with them, to take the "pressure" off.

Betty advises her not to talk to Arthur so much. She says it's like a switch that you can turn on and off. SB is surprised that Betty doesn't have these kinds of thoughts; but then, "Don is perfect."

Betty says she's feeling crummy again, so SB takes the dresses and leaves.

Freddie wakes up on the sofa in his office. He leaves the building holding his hat, jacket, and briefcase in front of his pants and announces his early departure. His wet shoe squeaks loudly as he walks out; the secretaries all look at one another.

Joan is lying on the couch in Roger's office - she thought he had left. She's been crying over Marilyn Monroe. Roger tries to reason with her. "This world destroyed her," she says. He tells her she's not like Marilyn, who had everything, and threw it all away.

To Roger's flippant attitude, she says, "one day you'll lose someone who's important to you. You'll see. It's very painful."

It must be Wednesday evening. Don has taken the kids out somewhere, and Betty has gotten dressed and washed her hair. She makes a snide remark about Don letting them in his car, and sends them to bed. Sally is sad that he's leaving again. He hugs her and calls her "Salamander," too cute. After she leaves, he tells Betty that Sally had called his office Monday night. Betty didn't even know.

He wants a cover story for the kids. He says he can either say he's working in Philadelphia during the week and come home on weekends, or he can just come home. Betty's angry that he was able to think up such a great lie on the spot, and kicks him out.

Next day at the office. Jane has brought him some shirts - from Menken's. She reminds him about the blood drive. It seems she's been looking out for him, as he told her not to.

Peggy tells Freddie the pitch went okay. He apologizes and thanks her for filling in for him. He zones out for a moment before going into his office. (I hope he didn't crap his pants.)

Betty is trying to pick the lock on Don's desk at home. I think she's still wearing the same blouse. Carla offers to take the kids out. Noting Betty's dark mood, Carla asks if she needs anything. Betty says she hasn't been sleeping well. Carla says "splash cold water on your face and go outside - you'll notice things are right where you left them."

Roger calls Don to his office. Duck and Pete are already there. Pete tells Don what Freddie did. Don says "how'd the presentation go?" but Roger and Duck and Pete all want him fired. Don sticks up for him, but it's a done deal. Duck doesn't want this sort of thing to happen in front of clients.

After Duck and Pete leave, Don is angry with Roger for letting Duck fire one of Don's people. His theory: Duck is a teetotaler, and that's why he has it in for Freddie. Roger says that he himself can fire anyone he wants. (They don't even want Cooper to know about this.) Apparently, they're going to call this a "six-month leave of absence," and Freddie will know what that means. Don is aghast that Roger is just throwing Freddie away. Roger says that Don's loyalty is becoming a liability.

Betty goes to the stables. From a distance, she sees Sara Beth flirting with Arthur. Betty approaches him after Sara Beth leaves and asks if he's seen her. He says he thinks he saw her on Monday. HA! She coyly remarks that it's good for SB to get out once in a while, and that it seems that being around Arthur cheers SB up, and she talks about him all the time. She suggests that they all meet for lunch and cheer her up.

Back at the office, the madmen are donating blood and joking about Freddie. Paul says that Hollis (elevator guy) has a novel. (I don't know if that means he's written one, he's reading one, or something else.) Don chastises them for making childish jokes about Freddie.

Don and Roger meet with Freddie in a restaurant (with drinks) to tell him about his six months' leave of absence - at full salary. Freddie doesn't understand what the big deal is, but he correctly guesses that Duck was involved in getting him fired. Apparently, Roger's father was the original Sterling of Sterling-Cooper, and he drank a lot, and he would have fired Freddie too.

Freddie tries to talk his way out of it, saying he'll be fine on Monday. Roger recommends that he go to Hazelden for treatment. Freddie considers working in some other city. His father, a greeting card salesman, used to randomly pick cities that they could move to so that he could sell his wares there.

But the plan for tonight is to party. They sneak through a side door in a dark building, Roger gives the bouncer a password ("swordfish") and some money, and the bouncer takes them down on the elevator to a private, illegal casino. Don is tense. Freddie tries to cheer him up. He's surprised that Pete Campbell had it in for him too.

Time passes. Don has not done especially well at the tables. Roger's had more luck. Freddie is still playing. A saloon girl wanders up, and Roger gets rid of her.

Roger can tell that Don's in the doghouse. Don doesn't want to talk about it. Roger - Mr. "Don't Get Married" - advises him to make nice with Betty.

Jimmy Barrett is playing at the same table as Freddie. Don punches him in the face and they all leave. They send Freddie away in a cab. He wonders what he'll tell his wife, and what he's going to do. Don tells him it's a fresh start. Freddie says he won't know who he is if he can't go to his job.

Roger and Don go to a quieter, Barrett-free bar. Roger teases Don about getting so angry. Don says "it was a real Archibald Whitman maneuver," allegedly some hothead drunk he used to know. (Actually, his father.) He admits he's staying at the Roosevelt. He doesn't want to discuss the details, but he doesn't feel bad about it, and in fact he's relieved.

Roger asks Don if he's in love. Don seems surprised by the question, and says that'd be easier - he'd know what to do. He says life's too short and "you have to move forward." Roger, who has survived two major coronary events, seems to take this to heart. (No pun intended.) "You gotta move forward. It's your life," he repeats. But it seems that Don's having an existential crisis of his own.

Next work day. Peggy's in a closed-door meeting with Don. He compliments her on the presentation. Samsonite wants her to be the copywriter; Freddie's supposedly taking a few months off, and Peggy will get all of his work.

Peggy knows what Don really means. She is shocked. Don is angry that he had to find out about this from Pete and Duck rather than from her. Peggy is horrified that they talked about it at all, and that this is how she's getting the promotion. He basically tells her to get over it.

She runs into Pete's office to yell at him for blabbing. (His secretary is also mad at him for blabbing.) He asks why she feels sorry for him; "those people" have no self-control and blame their problems on society. It's Freddie's own fault. She credits Freddie for getting her out of the secretarial pool; Pete thinks he deserves credit for her getting the original jr. copywriter job. He also figures the rest of them will all get raises and she'll move into a bigger office. Peggy is disgusted and leaves.

Sara Beth and Arthur both show up for lunch with Betty. SB is surprised to see Arthur. They're both still expecting Betty. SB tells Arthur her day just became more fun. He sweet-talks her the same way he tried to sweet-talk Betty. (He seems sincere. Is he for real? Or is he just very good at his game?)

Meanwhile, Betty is at home, dressed for the world of the living, but not dressed up for lunch. She's baking something with the kids. She casually takes the phone off the hook. (I don't know whether she thinks she's helping Sara Beth, or if she's making mischief on purpose.)

The madmen are having a meeting with Duck about using a nature-loving cartoon turtle mascot to soften people up for plans to build a power plant in their community. Duck asks Peggy if she's "on board with that." Petty seems surprised to remember that she has Freddie's job now.

Mona bursts into Don's office, hopping mad, to inform Don that Roger's leaving her for a secretary. She thinks it's Don's fault. Something about how it's his life and he has to move forward.

Roger is waiting for her outside. She refuses to speak to him and refers him to their daughter Margaret.

Jane is cringing at her desk. Roger reaches for her, and she runs away.

Don stares at Roger in disbelief. Roger says he can explain. Don doesn't want Jane as his secretary any more.

Closing music: "I'm Through With Love," Marilyn Monroe. Nice slideshow here.
Quote of the week: "Can't you find something else to do besides dining on the drama of other people's lives like a bunch of teenage girls?" (Don)
Next week: Betty's still mad, but it seems her father is even madder.

And now, let's remember Freddie Rumsen as he was:

Betty Draper plans a 3-way?

Another Mad Men Episode 9 teaser clip

Also, I've copied all of the Season 2 recaps so far from the old site. I backdated them to 9/22 so that the more timely stuff didn't get shoved to the very bottom of the page.

9/25/08: Great Moments in "The Office"

I didn't record this show, and as a result I missed some of the best quotes. But these are perfectly good too:

Dwight: Hold it in your mouth if you can't swallow.
Jim (to Michael): Nothing?

Jim: Friends don't talk about other friends' butts.

Pam: I will be a little fish in the Big Apple.

Andy: My uncle went to Cornell with the current groundskeeper.

Jan:: You know that girl who went missing... guess whose candles they used for the vigil?

Michael: I once went 28 years without having sex.

Jim: Just going to see Pam. Maybe put up some shelves.
(This is much funnier if you remember a certain scene from Three's Company.)

Creed: That wasn't a tapeworm.

Michael: You know my seduction method.

Michael: We are the goateeless brothers.

Toby: It's nice to have visitors.

Mad Men stuff

Obviously, I haven't gotten around to sprucing up the site yet, but I have some Mad Men stuff to share:

• Mad Men Season 2 so far: Thursday September 25, 4 pm to midnight ET. (Sorry for the short notice - I just found out!)
  
  
• There was a "You Could Be on Mad Men Contest" that I also didn't know about. Poo. (I'm in the loop now, though, baby!) People submitted video clips of themselves as a Mad Men character. The winning video is a scream.
  
  
• You've probably already seen the ad for Sunday's episode a million times, but here's a bonus preview clip. Honestly, if I hadn't been told that this was a preview clip, I would have guessed that it was something they shot as a joke; it's surreal, and the guys are obviously out of their element. Also, this intriguing photo.

Mad Men #21 (2.8), 9/14/08: Agitation

Saturday morning.

Betty has an exhausting workout with her horse. Don is still lounging in bed when she gets home. She is feeling some stress about a party next week. An electrical outlet in the dining room needs to be replaced. He wants an electrician to do it; he joking suggests that Betty could do it (Betty is in no humor); finally he promises to do it.

Peggy arrives at Anita's with colored pencils for the boys and a Horatio Hornblower book for Gerry, who is in bed with a bad back again. (He had been hoping she'd find him a sequel to Moby Dick.) Anita says he cried at the chiropractor, so I guess he's hurtin' for real.

Father Gill drops in to see Gerry. He and Peggy make awkward small talk. He wants her to be more "involved" - he asks her to help with publicity for the CYO dance. The promotion for last year's event was a dud. The committee really wants kids to show up for this one.

Suddenly, it's Monday. Duck tells Harry that he now costs more than he makes. A Russian "agitator" scene in a TV movie led into a washing machine commercial spotlighting its special "agitator" - the client is mad and doesn't want to pay. Henry needs to read all the scripts to avoid this kinds of conflicts. The mad men aren't particularly supportive or sympathetic.

New client: Heineken. Duck warns Don that they want to compete in bars. Don thinks that a foreign beer will appeal to housewives and the home market. As a test, they should put it in some grocery stores in affluent areas and see what happens. Pete agrees. Duck's skeptical and warns that Heineken still needs to be convinced.

Duck says he's not sure he can make Don's party. Don says the party is more Roger's idea, because he wants them to meet with Crab Colson (the guy from the country club two weeks ago who was building a bomb shelter). Pete is curious, but they do not elaborate.

Meanwhile, back in the 'burbs, Betty gets annoyed with a wobbly formal dining room chair and smashes it up. The kids turn their attention from The Three Stooges to watch.

Harry asks Roger about expanding the TV department. There should be someone who reads the scripts full time. Roger turns him down. Harry thinks some accountant named Mitch is out to get him.

Fr. Gill calls Peggy. (Peggy answers her phone as Peggy's secretary, then waits and answers as herself.) There's a problem with the flyer for the dance. "A Night to Remember" is too sexy ("it sends the wrong message to the girls"). Peggy thinks she knows better, so he asks her to speak to "them" so they won't feel left out.

Roger has told Joan that Harry needs a "girl" to help with the work. This isn't what Harry had in mind, but Joan thinks it's interesting and takes the scripts home. Harry's officemate Warren is totally in love with her.

It's already the night of the party. Roger and Mona are there, and Crab Cowan and wife Petra are there. Sally is dancing for them.

Duck shows up, late and dateless, but with flowers. Don introduces the kids and sends them to bed. He asks for tomato juice instead of a cocktail. Roger gets a big kick out of introducing the Crab to the Duck. The Cowans and Sterlings commiserate about the high cost of boat ownership, and Crab tries to get Don to join the country club.

It's time to eat. Roger confides to Don that he likes Crab. Petra bounces drunkenly off the doorframe, so you know she'll fit right in with this gang too.

Betty introduces the dinner, which is a culinary trip around the world. The drink choices are burgundy from France, or beer from Holland. Duck thinks Don bought it. Don pleads innocent. Betty has no idea what they're talking about, and she's not amused by the explanation when everyone laughs at how brilliant Don was when he predicted that housewives would buy Heineken.

Petra begs to sit down. Mona asks for wine right away. Duck sips water.

Peggy explains "A Night to Remember" to the committee. It's about hand-holding that will someday lead to marriage. The ladies are very concerned about the drawing, too, because the kids are dancing too close together. (Honestly, I'm not sure why they even want this dance to take place.) Even though their last dance had very poor attendance, they aren't willing to consider new ideas. Peggy ends the meeting with "I'll see what I can do." She's annoyed with Fr. Gill for not making it clear that they should respect her expertise. (Imagine if Duck or Don went into a meeting with that attitude!)

Joan's Dr. Boyfriend comes home and complains that she didn't set the table yet. She asks him questions about comas based on what she's read in scripts for As the World Turns. He thinks she should be watching the shows with bonbons in her lap, not reading them. He sends her to the kitchen to fetch him some water.

Betty sends Carla home after the party. Carla congratulates her on a successful party. Betty snaps off the TV and confronts Don for embarrassing her about the beer. Yes, she's angry that he knows her so well. He knows everything about her. And then they all laughed, like they were all in on a joke about her. She was embarrassed. He says he didn't mean it. He assures her that no one will remember that, and that she's making too much of a big deal of this.

She tells him she knows about him and Bobbie. He is shocked.


"How could you? She's so old!"

She says Jimmy told her everything. He tries to find out how much she knows, but she won't tell him. He won't admit to anything, but he doesn't explicitly deny it either. Instead, he says things like "you think I would sleep with that woman?" She accuses him of lying. He goes to bed. Betty spends the night in Sally's bed. She's still wearing her party dress at the breakfast table the next morning.

Harry introduces Joan to two representatives from Maytag. They love Joan. Everything's been smoothed over.

Betty's still wearing the dress. She's drinking - it's very early in the day - and going through all of Don's things, looking for evidence. First the clothes in his closet, all of the pockets, then his desk, every note-on-a-napkin. There are old valentines from Sally, his "What do women want?" riddle for deodorant, but none of what Betty is looking for.

It's 11 AM and time for the Heineken meeting. Pete says people are drinking more at home. Heineken still isn't interested in this market. Don says their test in supermarkets did very well. He grimaces as Duck talks about the incident at the party. "It sounds like you do know your wife," the Heineken guy says. Duck describes her as the perfect wife. They could even use her menu in their ads in ladies' magazines. The Heineken guys are impressed by the potential, and agree to a regional campaign. ("Why would I lie?" Don asks ironically.)

Joan and Harry meet with some client to make recommendations based on the scripts Joan has read. She's excited about the upcoming coma storyline, which will be a blockbuster, and has done some additional homework to discover that there will be a big summer promotion too. She convinces the client to lock in before advertising premiums go up. The client specifically thanks Joan for her help.

Betty is on the bed, still in the party dress. Sally asks if she's okay and offers aspirin. Betty says she needs some rest and tells her to go play with Bobby. She tries to get out of bed and steps on her wineglass, breaking it and cutting her foot.

Roger tells Harry that all is well again. Better than well. He wants Joan's work to be converted to a full-time job, paying $150 a week. "He" will have to share an office. (Roger pauses in front of his door, waiting for Harry to open it for him.)

Don comes home to a dark, quiet house. The kids are in bed. (I'm trying to imagine the childhood that Sally and Bobby are going to remember growing up; drunk mom hanging around in a party dress all day, shooting the neighbor's pigeons, smashing chairs, putting them to bed whenever she's in a bad mood....) Betty is still in the dress, still drunk. She tells him she went through all his things and found nothing but advertising notes. She doesn't understand how he could do this to her. He denies that he did anything.

After the commercial break, Don is sleeping on the couch. Betty has finally washed up and changed. She wants to talk. He reaches for her. She doesn't let him smooth it away with sex. She observes that only now does he look her in the eye. And he never says he loves her. He says he says it all the time. (Not that I've noticed. I think he would love her more if she were an advertising mascot, like the Swiss Miss. Or maybe the Utz cartoon girl!) She asks if he hates her. He looks her in the eye and says he loves her and the children and he doesn't want to lose them. She walks away.

Another weekday morning. Peggy shows Fr. Gill around the office. Ken and Pete joke that this must be the "Miracle" Whip account. They wonder if Peggy's an undercover nun.

Harry thanks Joan for "filling in" and introduces her to Danny Lindstrom (he'd rather be called "Dan"), who will take over the job she's been putting her heart and soul into. Boy, do I feel for her. Finally she finds something that really means something to her, and she has to hand it off to some new guy. She's supposed to train him. Right now. So she explains the basic premise of the job in a few sentences. There's lots more that she could tell him, like the storylines of all the daytime soaps, and all the contact people she's spoken to in her spare time, but a hard swallow signals us (but not those clueless oafs) that she's getting choked up. Dan assumes she'll be around to help with the "details."

Fr. Gill is enchanted with the copy machine. Since they're alone, he asks her if she has something she needs to talk about, since he noticed she doesn't take Communion. "God already knows," he reminds her. In that case, she thinks there's no need to talk. And she doesn't think Fr. Gill would understand. He says she's pushing everyone away, there's no sin so big that she can't reconcile herself with God and have a new start. Does she feel that she doesn't deserve God's love? "Your copies are done," she replies. She boxes them up (I can see that they're different from the original flyer, but I can't make them out) and sends him on his way.

Betty checks the roast and sits down in front of the TV. Jimmy's Utz commercial comes on. Betty frowns.

Duck tells Don they've placed Heiney in lots of big markets. Betty calls and tells Don not to come home. That's it. She hangs up. She turns off (or down) the oven.

Joan's getting ready for bed.
Peggy's sitting in the bathtub.
Fr. Gill takes off his priest stuff and transforms into a regular man. He takes out a guitar and sings a song I should recognize, but don't, a little bit off-key.
Don has a Heineken in the break room.

Closing music: ??
Next week: Peggy accuses Pete of blabbing about something.

Mad Men #20 (2.7), 9/7/08: Modern Problems

Don admires a blue Cadillac. The dealer tries to snow Don into buying it. When he realizes that Don was sent by Roger, he goes for the keys.

Flashback: The new Don Draper is selling a used car to a kid named Charlie. The kid's not sure if he wants it. Don nudges, but doesn't push. A woman comes to see him, so he lets the boy talk to his father.

The woman is from the real Donald Draper's past, and she knows that's not him.

Shaken by the memory, Don turns down the salesman's offer of a test drive and leaves.

In the office, Roger flirts with Jane. She cuts him off. Don comes in. Jane says Mrs. Barrett called. Roger tells her to get Duck.

Roger thinks Don should be hot for Jane. He tries to cheer Don up about the incredibly high price tag ($6,500!!!) of the Cadillac.

Duck shows up. Their coffee client has some kind of problem and Duck had to spend Saturday birdwatching with one of their guys to keep him happy. Our long-lost young friends Kurt and Smitty show up (after attempting, unsuccessfully, to flirt with Jane) to give their youthful perspectives. Smitty quotes a poetic statement from a 60-page manifesto written by a friend in school - his "focus group." He's a member of SLS. Kurt makes a nonsensical comment. Don really doesn't see where this is going, but braces himself for their pitch.

Meanwhile, the rest of the madmen watch as Paul pours coffee into a disposable diaper next to a naked baby doll. (When you think about it, it's a good thing they used blue liquid for color broadcasts.) They want to send this setup to every maternity nurse. Don has already weighed in on this - the price is going to be a problem. Sal thinks that at 10 cents apiece, they should be reusable. Jane comes in with some other notes from Don. Ken beams at her. They ask Jane to clean up the diapers.

Harry boasts that he's going to meet with Cooper tomorrow. Sal says it's to ask his opinion of a painting. Ken jokes to Jane about how gullible Harry is. Harry is bummed because he was hoping Cooper would expand the TV department, which currently consists only of him. Jane tells him to go see the painting now - Cooper has left for the day. She thinks they should all sneak up for a look. In any case, she's going. Ken, Paul, Sal, and Harry eagerly follow.

Cooper's secretary is missing, and his door is open. The guys are scared, but Jane is fearless. They do, however, remove their shoes. Paul chickens out and leaves.

The rest of them gaze at a $10,000 blur in red. Sal recognizes the work of Mark Rothko. Jane shrugs at it and wanders aimlessly around the office. Harry nervously tries to anticipate the kind of reaction Cooper will want. He searches Cooper's office (!!) for an explanatory brochure. Sal doesn't think Cooper really understands it. He tries to figure out what the painting "means." Ken says it makes him feel something very deep. Ken's spontaneous reaction takes Sal by surprise.

They get their things and leave. Jane jokes that they could have stolen it. Ken considers writing a story about the experience. (He makes sure to tell Jane that he's been published.) Feigning confusion, Jane refers to him as an "accountant." Sal openly admires Ken's skill as an author.

Next day, Ken wants to tell Paul all about how exciting Jane is. Paul would rather hear about the painting. Joan overhears - Ken flees. She tells Paul she "heard" that he, Ken, and Jane were in Cooper's office. Although she's obviously bluffing, Paul confirms enough of her suspicions by saying that he had nothing to do with it. "Nothing happened," he adds hastily.

Kurt and Smitty are telling Sal that they don't need artwork for their pitch to Martinson's Coffee at 3. Don signed off on it.

Ken approaches Sal, remembering his kind words about his writing, and says "you're not like everyone else around here." Sal denies this. Ken asks him to beta-read his new story. Sal invites him over for dinner on Sunday.

Don begins the coffee meeting with a short preamble about the importance of using young people to reach a young audience. Smitty pitches his anti-authority, anti-establishment message. Martinson's coffee is delicious, hot, and brown. They play a song about sexy naked Mexican girls with coffee. The client asks Peggy's opinion. "It stays with you." Client asks about the visuals. "If you sign, we'll tell you," Don says.

Harry goes to Cooper's office for his meeting. It is, as he had hoped, about his TV gig, but Harry keeps looking at the painting. Cooper scolds him for not paying attention. Harry pretends to recognize it as a Rothko work, and asks Cooper's opinion. Surprised, Cooper replies "it's none of your business." Then he asks Harry what he thinks of it. Harry admits he knows nothing about art. Cooper tells him not to worry about it, and focus on the numbers instead.

But Cooper himself is stuck on the painting - because of the numbers. He expects it will double in value by Christmas.

Jimmy Barrett calls Betty at home. He tells her that "Grin & Barrett" got picked up. He tells Betty to book Don's "dance card" for the night of the party. He begs Betty to go to the party. He flirts with her, then tries a more sincere approach and makes it personal. Betty promises nothing, but says "we will try."

Martinson's really liked Kurt & Smitty's pitch. Don congratulates Duck. Duck is hoping to get a shot at Life Savers next.

Jane reports that Cooper asked for Don. Duck isn't invited.

Roger is there. Jim Van Dyke, of Martinson's Coffee, wants Don to be a board member of a museum that doesn't exist yet - the Museum of Early American Folk Art. Philanthropy is the gateway to power (says Cooper, the Ayn Rand fan), and Don will be wearing his tuxedo more often. (I don't know whether "tuxedo" was still considered gauche in 1962, but for a long time, "dinner jacket" was the preferred term.) He sends Roger out and tells Don he's made the big, big time.

Don goes back to the dealership and sits in the Cadillac. He still doesn't want a test drive. He wants to buy it.

Joan calls Jane on her unauthorized visit to Cooper's office. Jane blames it on "them." Joan doesn't buy it. Jane is cocky; she's a whole 20 years old and asks if Joan is the only person who gets to have fun. Joan tells Jane to pack up and leave.

Betty is delighted with the Cadillac. It has a headlight sensor that dims the lights when another car approaches. (What the hell? 46 years later, why doesn't my car - a Toyota with a darkness sensor that turns the headlights on automatically - have this?) Betty tells Don about Jimmy's party.

The car makes Betty horny. They have an hour before the kids come home. "Not in here," Don says.

Jane takes her boxful of things to Roger's office "to say goodbye." He is confused. She tells him Joan fired her. He offers her a drink and says Joan's "going through a tough time." Roger is kind to Jane, who finally reveals that she lives on Jane St. in Greenwich Village (he's asked her before where she lives), and tells her to come back on Monday.

It must be Sunday now, because Ken goes to Sal & Kitty's for wine and spaghetti. It turns out that Kitty grew up in Sal's old neighborhood in Baltimore.

Ken is awed by Sal's sauce. Ken begs for Sal's opinion of his story, "The Gold Violin." Kitty hasn't read it yet. Sal was awed by it. Ken is awed by Sal's acclaim.

The Cadillac has taken Don, Betty, and the kids on a picnic. Bobby has to pee. Don sends him behind a tree. Sally wants to too. Don thinks everyone should before they get back in the car. Now Sally doesn't have to.

Don says that when he was a kid, they had to feel their way to the outhouse on a rope on moonless night. Sally asks if they're rich. Betty thinks talking about money isn't polite. Bobby is proud of himself for having tinkled outdoors successfully. Don hurls his beer can, hopefully into a wastebasket, but who knows.

Sal and Ken finish the wine and talk about work. (They wonder what Harry's meeting with Cooper was about, and if Coop's going to meet with everyone.) Kitty keeps trying to get into the conversation, but Sal changes the subject back to Ken every time.

He asks Ken why he doesn't write for a living. Ken says it's just for fun. This amazes Sal. Ken volunteers to leave. Sal says "you can't" and offers him a cigarette and coffee. Ken begs off with a to-go dessert and kisses Kitty goodbye on the cheek.

Sal turns down Kitty's offer for pie and says he'll clean up. Kitty is upset that she feels awkward and left out around Sal's coworkers. He apologizes. She has been feeling like a social dud and thinks he ignores her. He apologizes again, profusely, and tells her to sit down and relax with some pie while he cleans up. He does seem sorry.

He picks up the cigarette lighter (is it Ken's?) and puts it in his pocket.

Jane shows up to work on Monday. Ken tries to lure her on a date to a Mets game. She blows him off. Ken tells Sal he'd like to call Kitty to thank her for her hospitality. He admits to Sal that a visit like that makes him regret being a bachelor.

Joan goes to Jane's desk to confront her. Jane asks if Roger spoke to her. She says Roger said that Joan loses her temper a lot, and it's not serious. Joan is angry with Jane for speaking to "Mr. Sterling." Jane says she simply "ran into him" on her way out. Joan is very cold, and her tone makes it clear that she thinks Jane is having a thing with Roger.

Don and Betty go to Jimmy's party. Bobbie greets Betty first, then Don. Don wants to get out of there to "get drinks." Unfortunately Betty volunteers, leaving Don with Bobbie. Her idea is basically a scheme to get Jimmy a Rolex. The guy from ABC is okay with this as long as they kill Candid Camera in the ratings.

Jimmy corners Betty, who is relieved to have someone to talk to. He offers her a drink; she says she's too drunk, but Jimmy jokes that a drink for her will make him funny. ABC's research proved it.

He pulls her aside for a chat. He praises Betty lavishly and flirts mercilessly. He notes how Don and Bobbie and the ABC guy are looking cozy. He cannot shut up about how hot Betty is and asks how much she thinks has happened between Don and Bobbie. Betty is offended. Jimmy doesn't back down. Betty says, "you people are ugly and crude." He asks, "what people? You mean comedians?"

Sal and Kitty sit in opposite corners of their living room in the dark, watching TV. She does embroidery, he lights a cigarette with that lighter that I guess must be Ken's because he gives it a special look. (Are we headed for a love triangle from hell? I hope so! Um, I mean I hope not! I don't know if I can take the angst!)

Jimmy approaches Don and thanks him for getting him the show and everything he wants. He says not too many people get that. As for Bobbie, he says, "lots of people have had that."


Whee! Video!

Of course Don denies everything with a straight face. Jimmy calls Don garbage for screwing Bobbie and recommends that he go to a whore instead. Betty shows up, and Jimmy bids them a cheery good-night.

Don and Betty drive home in his luscious Cadillac in dreadful silence... until Betty starts barfing. In the Cadillac.

Closing music: "Break It to Me Gently" (Brenda Lee)
Quote of the week: "Young people do not drink coffee, and that can become a lifetime habit." (Don Draper)